ceasetoexist | In Which Boredom Reigns Supreme

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In Which Boredom Reigns Supreme

You know, I tried watching the television today, only to remember just how bad it sucked. Seriously, there's nothing but happy crap on and, I'll tell you, not too interested in that. I'd have gone to the library, but I pretty much read most of the stuff they have in the kids section and there's pretty much little to nothing in any of the other sections friggin' worth anything.

So I was thinking: a lot of you people probably came from some interesting places, or did some interesting things, or know some interesting people, or yada-yada-yada. Basically, I'll cut to the chase: tell me about the places your from or the people you know, cause I'm bored as can be and I'll pretty much take anything as a way to entertain myself. You want a story in return? Fine, I can do that; there's a lot of crazy junk I've seen.

But c'mon. Entertain me. I'm bored here.

[Filtered to Franken Fran]

Hey, you're the crazy doctor or nurse or whatever I talked to a bit on the phone during the Soviet schtick, right?

There's something I want to ask you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, I had the internet back at home. It was pretty cool, if it didn't take so long to load and didn't cut off use of the phone when you used it.

[Kid's from 1995, Clyde; even though he's a time traveler, he doesn't know ALL about your high-tech shit, though he's interested.]

...Huh. I dunno. Never really tried it, but maybe!

Wow, really? Wait.. did you have dial up? Also, do you have a Facebook? [ not that he needs more friends noooo ]

[ 1995? Man, that's so long ago. Is he really interested? That almost sounds like a compliment. ]

If all we have to do is pretend like we're their kids then we oughta get what we want in no time! My not dad told me if I cleaned my room I could get ice cream.

I...guess?

The hell's a Facebook?

Pfft. They're lying. That's what all parents do. They tell you they're going to give you something if you do it, then they don't deliver jack.

It's.. a blog? I guess that's what it called. It's a site where you keep in touch with your friends from school and stuff.

Wait, so.. no ice cream?

Blog? [Still too new for him Clyde]

Oh. Well...no. I don't have one.

I dunno. I mean, it's worth a shot but don't cry like a little itty-bitty baby when you don't get crap.

Oh.

I haven't gotten my ice cream yet.. [ s-sniffle ] So I cleaned my not room for nothing, then?

Jesus, kid, quit crying.

Did you even tell your not parents or anything that you cleaned your room, or are you just magically hoping they'll notice.

What? I didn't know about these rules. Is that how it works? Normally my real mom is the one always cleaning my room.

Meh, I don't usually give enough of a crap to clean my room unless my dad threatens me.

But yeah. They actually have to be let known. They can't just, like, psychically tell if you cleaned your room or not.

Hey, thanks. I'll do that. How long have you been here anyway?

About a week and a half.

That long? Wow. And you must be really bored if you wanna know about the people here.

Some of them are really interesting and weird. And hell yes I'm bored.

What's your name, kid?

I guess.. I did just meet someone from the 1940's earlier today.

Clyde Donovan. And yours?

Yeah? Who was that?

Pokey Minch.

This kid named Raivis. He's from Latvia and he drinks vodka when he's depressed.

Pokey, huh? Okay, I got a few questions to pass the time. Ah, ..where are you from? Country, states, cities; do you have that? What would you be doing right now if you weren't stuck in this place?

Haven't heard of him.

I'm from Onett, a town in Eagleland. Think of it as a...real nice version of America. Like all the crime and corruption? Pretty much gone. We have towns and cities and countries, but not really state divisions. Just countries as cultural dividers.

And if I wasn't here? Probably still traveling through time and space.

He's actually pretty cool and he stutters a lot. Kind of like my friend Tweek minus the screaming.

A nicer version of America? Wow, that'd be sweet. If I had lived there maybe I wouldn't have to worry about it back home. It pretty much sucks in Colorado and everywhere in general, all the adults are idiots.

Is that all? [ well, whatever floats your boat~ ] Have you ever gone back to change things in the future?

Adults are idiots everywhere. People in general are. And if they aren't idiots, they're either crazy or cruel.

It was meh. Realy boring, for the most part.

Not how it works. If I attempted to cause a change in what had already happened, it would simply create a separate time line. Things would have still happened as they did where I'm from, i would have just created a parallel universe as well.

[ hmm.. he doesn't exactly know how to reply to that.. ] So you grouped everyone into three sections? Where do you and I fit in?

But life is suppose to be boring. At least, I think so. Otherwise you'll end up in places Somalia where there isn't even any treasure! That Asshole.

Huh. Y'know, normally I wouldn't have understood that but that actually made sense. So either way you can do back to your place without any changes, right?

Eh, they're not the only ones, just the most common. Dunno where you fit in, but I know where I fit in. And that's what matters.

Pfft. Screw that. Maybe that's how some people's lives are, sure as hell isn't what my life is going to be like though. ...What asshole?

Pretty much. Don't really want to go back anyway, to be honest.

[ he's probably in the idiot section. sad but true. ] Yeah? Where do you fit in then?

I guess some people don't have much of a choice but to live like that. Y'know, money, intelligence, things like that.. they're a big issue. I feel bad for some third world countries. Just.. some kid I know back home. I mean, he's cool sometimes, sometimes. But he's still a manipulative, er.. jerk.

Do you like it here?

I'm a genius, clearly.

Those are pretty much two of the most powerful things in the world.

Yeah? So what's the kid's problem? I mean, what are some examples of what he's done?

[He's pretty interested in how he might compare to some other manipulative kid,if just because he wants to know what some other predators out there are like.]

It's not really a question as to whether or not I like it here. I can't get out.

But eh, it's not the worst place I've ever been. The apparent constant threat of possible death ain't all that great, though.

A genius, huh? [ it takes one to know one it seems ] If you say so.

Not powerful, just important. Money doesn't exactly buy happiness and being intelligent is kind of intimidating.

[ aah, where to start~ ] His name's Eric Cartman. He's a sociopath. One time he killed this one kid's parents and grounded them in chili and fed it to him. Then later he found out that kid's dad was actually his dad, too. Oh, but.. that makes him a ginger. Aha.. [ wait, ew, gross ] But still, everyone at school makes fun of him for being a fatass. Also he doesn't have a lot of friends. And sometimes he dresses up like Hitler and says he's anti-Semitic; hating Jewish people and stuff. Like Kyle, he's Jewish. And he hates Cartman. This other time Cartman got AIDS, and he gave them to Kyle. I dunno how that happened, though, but later both of them found a cure for it. He's done a lot of other things, too. I don't really care much. I think I'll stop talking about him now. Plus Craig says I should just stay away from him and the others.

Hmm.. It's just kind of weird how we got in but we can't get out. There could be a way out somehow.

Don't doubt me Clyde, or you're going to be straight back at pissing me off.

[He listens to him talk about Cartman, and gives a small pause before he continues. Technically, a lot of what he'd had planned was far worse than anything this Cartman kid had actually done but, at the same time, he'd yet to have killed anyone like this other kid. Clearly crazy, but he was pretty sure that if he ever ran into him, he'd still be the bigger predator. He hoped.]

Wow.

What a massive dick.

There could be, but it could also be an encapsulated space. A dimension where whoever nabbed us can put us in, and only they can take us out.

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