[Lucas will simply sit quietly, his gaze directed slightly upwards. He doesn't think he can trust himself to look at Porky and still maintain a sense of calmness.]
You probably know by now, the way I feel about a lot of things. All of those things you think are worthless . . . I believed in them.
[His gaze will shift down now, his hands cupped loosely over his lap.]
When you were still . . . you. I needed to understand how someone could ever become like that. I guess, because . . . if you really believed that love or friendship or compassion were useless and stupid, then what I had always believed couldn't be right. Love is . . . the most important thing in the world, the thing that binds us all together and makes us whole. If you rejected it, then . . . at least for one person, it had failed. So I definitely needed to know, why.
But I think I can understand, now. Not exactly understand you, maybe, but . . . meeting different people here, from different worlds - Every single world has war. It was hard for me to believe, but . . . I think it must be true. Every single world has people who believe in fighting and hatred and war. So either I was really wrong, or I wasn't thinking about it the right way.
I guess I'm a little biased, but . . . I think I have a new idea. It's fine that there are people who believe that things like power or money are the most important things. It's fine, because . . . it just means they haven't ever had what was truly important. Or they haven't understood it. So if you haven't ever had or ever understood it, then . . . I can understand. Or at least, I couldn't blame you.
So . . . I don't think I have any questions. If you never tell me about your life with Ness or Jeff, or why you did the things you did, that's OK. I don't have to know. If you want to tell me anyway, I'll listen. . . . -- Oh. I guess I lied. I think I do want to ask . . . what finally made you change your mind. But you don't have to say that if you don't want to, either.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-31 04:09 am (UTC)You probably know by now, the way I feel about a lot of things. All of those things you think are worthless . . . I believed in them.
[His gaze will shift down now, his hands cupped loosely over his lap.]
When you were still . . . you. I needed to understand how someone could ever become like that. I guess, because . . . if you really believed that love or friendship or compassion were useless and stupid, then what I had always believed couldn't be right. Love is . . . the most important thing in the world, the thing that binds us all together and makes us whole. If you rejected it, then . . . at least for one person, it had failed. So I definitely needed to know, why.
But I think I can understand, now. Not exactly understand you, maybe, but . . . meeting different people here, from different worlds - Every single world has war. It was hard for me to believe, but . . . I think it must be true. Every single world has people who believe in fighting and hatred and war. So either I was really wrong, or I wasn't thinking about it the right way.
I guess I'm a little biased, but . . . I think I have a new idea. It's fine that there are people who believe that things like power or money are the most important things. It's fine, because . . . it just means they haven't ever had what was truly important. Or they haven't understood it. So if you haven't ever had or ever understood it, then . . . I can understand. Or at least, I couldn't blame you.
So . . . I don't think I have any questions. If you never tell me about your life with Ness or Jeff, or why you did the things you did, that's OK. I don't have to know. If you want to tell me anyway, I'll listen. . . . -- Oh. I guess I lied. I think I do want to ask . . . what finally made you change your mind. But you don't have to say that if you don't want to, either.