48 - Action

[ceasetoexist]

[He doesn't feel guilt. At all. It's not Pokey's fault his new "sister" ended up drinking the milk last time. And besides, what happened to her wasn't so bad. It was just a hallucination. So there was no reason at all to feel bad for having let her drink it.

But he does. He can't stop it. He does. So that's why he guesses he ended up drinking it today, despite knowing just how stupid that was of him.

And then? He just felt....weird.]

[Well, someone got hormone free milk today! Feel free to find Pokey going through a variety of emotions throughout town.]

A. Overwhelming Happiness

[My god. He just feels wonderful. And Pokey really just can't contain it. It's a light and bubbly and free feeling, and he can't help but find ways to express it. In ways he'd usually find pretty stupid, but you know what? He doesn't care. For the most part, he can be found just strolling down the street, humming to himself happily which is just bizarre if you know who he is. Or you can find him chasing birds at the park, laughing happily to himself as he waves his arms, scaring them and forcing them to scatter. Or you can find him at the playground at school, despite it being closed, tearing ass around the playground. He especially seems to like the swings, standing up on the seat as he swings to and fro, laughing.]

B. Crushing Despair

[Hey is that a fat kid just nearly bawling his eyes out in public, despite his best efforts to hide it by scrunching up beside a building or trying to duck into an alleyway.

Yep. Sure is. Dear lord is he crying.]

C. Insane Rage

[Oh look it's a giant spider mech stomping down the street. And on your car. And smashing your mailbox. Hey. At least the thing isn't destroying houses.

Yet.]

D. Unremarkably Morose; locked to 502 Ricardo Street

[Hey other residents. Feel free to notice that Pokey is at the kitchen table. Just sitting there. Writing. He appears to be writing a list of names, and descriptions of people. And occasionally? He takes off a small, plastic four-leaf clover pin he has attached to the lapel of his shirt and stares at it.]

Comments

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

What did I feel like with the power to mutate an entire world along with all its memories?

I felt as if I became God.

... But on a personal level? They didn't mean much. Going through those memories is like going through a stranger's photo album. It's... data. Data I needed as a tool, but don't really need to live.

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

You know? Always wanted to be something like that. When I was little. I always knew that I wanted to be a god. Because if I was that? I could do anything, to anyone, and no one could do anything to me.

And now?

[He puts the pen down, running his hands through his hair. And laughs that weird, hollow, meaningless laugh again.]

It's the last thing on my mind.

Are there memories you think you need to live? I mean-

I'm just curious. I wouldn't have really thought that kind of crap would've made sense for a long time it's...I guess I understand that idea.

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

[Clod merely listens to another for once. Both children through whatever circumstances decided to strive for divinity. All for what? Simply to get back at others or to alleviate some pent-up aggravation after living about a mere decade or so in the world.

To Clod, all in all, everything seemed pointless now. Why fight in the first place? That is what she would like to ask "her" again if she ever got the opportunity.]

We need the memories that help remind us that we're wrong for wanting to do "anything to anyone".

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

[There's a pause there, for a moment, as he takes that in. Before slowly nodding his head.]

You're right. We do.

And the people that showed us that. Much as I hate to friggin' say that.

[More laughter. Actually kinda sincere this time.]

God, I can't believe I even said something that cheesy.

But by this point? I guess I mean it.

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

[Well, this got a smile out of Clod albeit a fairly weak one. There's more emotion inside that laughter and she picks up on the subtle change in atmosphere.]

Not everyone has people like that in their lives. Trust me. Despite how everything turned out, we're... well, kinda lucky.

... My sister's... given name is Shyna. Shyna Nera Shyna. Her other name is the Messiah. She was made to reboot Edo and terminate me.

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

.....More than you know.

[Considering he knows that he, or at least some version of him, will go on to end the world, alone and without ever having anyone?

Yeah. He ended up pretty well.]

...I had a little brother. Named Picky. He didn't do anything special, but he was the only member of my family worth a crap. I hope he's alright.

....How'd that end up going?

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

[She, on the other hand, already "died". She was cast into nonexistence as Edo rebooted. Mayfield is her real home now as much as that depresses her.]

Hehe. He must have been kind to you. Siblings should stick together.

I suppose... Shyna and I did. She's my older sister, but honestly, I was the one who had to take care of her. ... I could never understand all that wasteful optimism she carried around, but at the same time, I envied it.

I didn't think she would get too far in life, but I never thought she would stop trying. ... and I was right. She terminated me, saved the world, and doomed herself to a solitary life... happily.

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

[As far as he's concerned, Mayfield is his home too. Which sucks. But then again, he knows for a fact there's worse.]

....He was. He was kinder then he should've been. I picked on him, y'know. To try and toughen him up. To get him used to the world. And at the same time? ...I tried to protect him when I could. I wasn't good at it. But I tried.

[He listens. Just listens, eyebrows quirking up a bit at that.]

....Hero types. I'll never understand them.

[Or stop wanting to be like one, to a degree. Even more now.]

People are just confusing in general. [And he takes the little plastic four-leaf clover pin off, looking at it. Frowning, and yet smiling at the same time.] Some more than most.

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

It sounds very "big brother" of you. I think it worked. I think he at least understood what you tried to do. ... Heh. We can lie to ourselves as much as we want, but no matter how much our bodies and minds are torn apart, we'll never really forget the ones we really care about.

... as much of a nuisance it can be.

[She notices the pin Pokey is wearing. Until now, her mind has been debating whether or not it was proper to ask. The atmosphere seems lighter than before, so... why not?]

What's that you have there?

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

[He laughs a bit at that.]

I tried. .....For a long time, it was the only thing I was ever really proud of. It was probably the only thing I really had a right to be proud of.

[Pokey goes quiet, just turning the pin over in the light. There's nothing remarkable about it, not just by looking at it. It's clearly plastic, something you would get as a cheap handout at a bar or party. But he just looks for a moment, fondly, before responding.]

It's a reminder.

Both of a person I care a lot about, and to remember I still need to keep my guard up around people a lot of the time.

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

... Hm. Circumstances here change friends into enemies. Enemies into friends. The change is often forced.

You can never tell what's really going on.

[Despite wanting to keep somewhat of a friendly face, all of that was undone the day before. Clod showed a side of hers to strangers that she never showed before. Her true side.

Yet, the very next day, it seems that everything is just about back to normal.]

That pin is like... a crystallization of your bond with that person. It's almost a necessary thing to have around in all the chaos of this place.

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

...It's true. And you never really know people. And you have to live with that.

.....It sucks. And don't tell anyone I'd say this. But I'd like to imagine the people here are my friends more than my enemies. Don't get me wrong, some of them suck, and some of them deserve to die, but most of them? ....I guess I'm alright with.

[He just twists it around a little more, his voice going a bit lighter.]

It kind of is, I guess. ....I wish I had more. Of the people I know here. And especially of-

[He stops for a minute, mouth opening slightly. Both to catch himself from going on, and because he just remembered something.

He does have something of hers. Or a copy of it. He had never used it himself, but he made a copy of it when he lent her his. Made several for her, for the possibility of their use in the KND. But it'd been so long since he'd made one that he'd totally forgotten about it.

But he had it all the same. And he just sits there, quietly, dwelling.]

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

Lots of people would prefer having friends over enemies. ... but I understand. My lips are sealed.

[The smile that Clod that appeared on her face just now seems much more genuine than all her previous ones. She hasn't realize this, though. It's almost as if some unknown part of the girl's brain finally decided to function after all this time and reflexively act in response to what just might be genuine satisfaction.

Of course, all of this passes by Clod's notice. The emotion behind her smile fades away just as quickly as it appeared.

Clod also pauses momentarily and looks at Pokey, waiting for him to either speak his mind or silently save his thoughts. There was no reason to pull it out.]

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

[And saving them is exactly what he does. He gently puts the pin back on the lapel of his suit, fingers going to tapping on the desk for a moment.]

....Thank you.

....Do we want to chance not trying to drink the milk tomorrow?

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

[Clod has seen the consequences of not drinking the milk. Or at the very least, she's sure that there are consequences. Perhaps, maybe there's a loophole...]

We'll each drink half. If we do, we won't be hurt as badly and the effects probably won't last as long. Plus, I don't think we can get punished for actually drinking the stuff.

How about that?

[OOC: Despite everything that has been said... I'm damn sorry that I have to be such a bastard here.

To avoid getting droned, one person has to drink the entire bottle. Someone asked about this in the plotting thread. Thought the misunderstanding might be fun to take advantage of. The plan is still on.]

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

[He ponders that over a minute, chewing on his upper lip, before nodding.]

Alright. Sounds fair enough.

[OOC: That's cool with me! I had actually been thinking about it once too! And being a bastard to characters in Mayfield is just kind of how things are.

So, that being said? Which bottle should they get?]

[birthclod.livejournal.com]

["Fair". Clod liked the sound of that word. She liked keeping things fair for everybody or perhaps, just for her... Regardless, this was preferable over drinking the milk alone.]

Right.

... and also, Pokey. Remember that whatever this town turns us into, we'll still be friends. ... Words probably don't mean much, but just like you...

I'd prefer having more friends than enemies. I'm sick of having enemies.

[OOC: To really add insult to injury?

The regular milk.]

[godisachild.livejournal.com]

Yeah.

Me too.

[OOC: Heh, works for me.]